27 November, 2009

Me being profound

I was thinking once again which is not unusual these days. It seems to me that everyone in the world asks for that one big miracle at least once in a lifetime it might be to win the lottery or get a new car or just something simple like losing your childhood spots but what we don't realize that life is full of little miracles which we don't really notice. Its funny but it was just a thought I had.

26 November, 2009

a poem of christmas

Every Christmas everyone one sighs

That unexpected Christmas happiness sigh

Some get over cheerful

Some get very very playful

Some just sit, smile and cry

There are many reasons why

It could be long lost loves remembered

Tinged with happiness and the smallest of regret

Yet that first Christmas kiss you just remembered

And that gentle smile of yesterday

Comes once again to play

Then you look around

And so that Christmas sigh and smile

It reappears

As Christmas brings it seasons cheers


25 November, 2009

What can I say

When I write I try to write about what I know sometimes adding a bit of humor but even I know life is sometimes severe and cutting. So what I want to do is use some of your imagination. Just closed your eyes and imagine your homeless and haven't got a penny in your pocket, its raining and you are soaked. Now add to that you don't have a drink that you have to have everyday because you are a alcoholic. How do you feel?  

Nothing can change that feeling of hopelessness. 

This is what happens 365 days a year to most homeless people and it's OK for charities like crisis to say help the homeless help themselves but it always comes down to the fact that without a stable base the chances of someone getting their life in order is minimal. I know I did but I am one of the few. how many times did I really try? Not that many I did try a few times but as they say I was not ready for change.  Don't get me wrong crisis is one of my favorite charities but I sometimes wonder if they are losing site of the bigger picture and that is homelessness its self. Even I have heard the mumbling and whispers about people living in hostels and its clear people still think of them as not being homeless. I would love to hear from MP s with their own thoughts on this subject. Not their party line but their own thoughts but I think thats doubtful.

Christmas is a few weeks away and we will hear about homeless more at this time of year. My own story has been heard many times but I am glad to say my life changed for the good and is still changing daily. Best of all is I am still alive and kicking. 

24 November, 2009

Sitting and wondering about Christmas

I was just sitting watching TV  with a friend who never stops crying at Christmas films my flat is sure to cause flooding on a major scale but to get to the point, there I was sitting and I just got this thought what is Christmas and what does it truly mean. We have the church saying it's the day Christ was born. We have another saying its just one day each year of peace and love. So I began to think about what Christmas means to the homeless. When I was on the streets I used to beg for whatever I needed because I couldn't shoplift anymore drugs had got the better of me and I was in an awful state, not that it stopped me but I just kept getting caught. Just before every Christmas when begging I used to look forward to the people who had the Christmas spirit and gave five pounds plus which made them smile and me. I never went to the shelters for Xmas because they were too crowded and I wasn't ready to admit I was lost and I'd lost my personal battle with drugs. So to me back then Christmas was a time for having that little extra and a smile. There was nothing else to look forward to. After Christmas things would be just the same. It wasn't until I got straight that I realized that Christmas is the one day of the year that a strange kind of perfect love for everyone and everything somehow manifest its self. why? Who knows? Maybe it is the day Christ was born or maybe it's the only day we as human being see we can be so much more than we are? Maybe its just the one day of the year we get to be just what you see?

13 November, 2009

Me and my little voice

My voice has been quiet of late because there has been nothing to say except the same old boring thing called homelessness. I sometimes think whats the use, the government seem to convince people that its a thing of the past and the people in the street are so used to seeing people sleeping on the streets its become part of everyday life. Are we becoming immune to the fact that there is still a big problem? I've had my ups and downs over the last few years but I am still here living and breathing but a few of the people I knew on the streets are not. So when I hear some MP saying we are getting to grips with the problems of homelessness and its problems I get angry but I am only one little voice. Its loud but sometimes I feel its not loud enough. homelessness is a big problem and with it brings all the problems that you can't imagine, drugs, alcoholism. violence and abuse and sometimes prostitution. So if my voice is quiet now, wait till you hear me properly. 

07 November, 2009


How many chances does one need was the question ? that was the question asked, my automatic reply was as many as it takes but now I'm at home and I'm thinking about the people that will not take the chances given because they figure they are on their way out anyway or to put it another way they have given up and just want to be left alone. If we are truthful we have slightly given up on them too because its too hard and too tiring to do the same thing day after day although we keep on trying. The repeated failure gets to us too and we just go through the motions What can we do to change this? I don't think there is much we can do but too keep on trying but what I would love to see is what I call the last stop. It's a last stop place for hard and heavy drinkers to be. It takes them off the streets and keeps them safe and warm and to have someone on the premises 24hrs a day. Someone who does not judge and is there to help in anyway. I think they do have something like this in Scotland it's where drinkers spend there last days. Why am I writing this well I am so sad and fed up with going to funerals of people I know and some are paupers funerals. They spent their lives with nothing and no one and they die with nothing and no one . It doesn't seem fair