Thoughts while smoking

I was having a cigarette outside and yes I did put it out in the ash tray provided but I was thinking how strange life would be if everything went as smoothly as you expected it to. Take this morning for instance there I was blogging away merrily and when it came to linking my article, would it link? Would it hell. It was only after six tries that I finally managed it. It's like the girlfriend thing it goes from good to bad but that's what makes the relationship work. My life has been a lot of things but it's never been smooth and that's an under statement. I was just thinking what if as we all do sometimes. What if I hadn't been a drug addict would my life have been vastly different and I came to the conclusion. I doubt it because I was a lazy so and so, if I'm truthful about things. As a kid I thought that I would be doing the same job as my stepfather which involved just pushing a button and opening a sliding door on an injection molding machine. The funny thing about it is, I never did push a button or open any doors in a factory. Another thought I had was who is going to employ a fifty year old man who has never been employed by an employer. I have applied for several jobs but either had knock backs or prospective employers haven't had the decency to reply. It's that don't call us we'll call you attitude. I will keep on trying though things can only get better.